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"Golden, Ripe, Boneless Bananas, 39 Cents A Pound." - Ad in the "Missoulian" by Orange Street Food Farm |
"Sure there have been injuries and deaths in boxing - but none of them serious." - Alan Minter, Boxer |
"How to store your baby walker: First, remove baby." - Anonymous Manufacturer (Probably Disney) |
"You guys line up alphabetically by height." - Bill Peterson, Florida State football coach |
"Men, I want you just thinking of one word all season. One word and one word only: Super Bowl." - Bill Peterson, football coach |
"I get to go to lots of overseas places, like Canada." - Britney Spears, Pop Singer |
"The team has come along slow but fast." - Casey Stengel, Baseball player/manager |
"China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese." - Charles De Gaulle, former French President |
"Football players win football games." - Chuck Knox, football coach |
"Most lies about blondes are false." - Cincinnati Times-Star, headline (Note: The quotee was blonde.) |
"I love California, I practically grew up in Phoenix." - Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice President |
"I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the law." - David Dinkins, New York City Mayor, answering accusations that he failed to pay his taxes. |
"The only reason we're 7-0 is because we've won all seven of our games." - David Garcia, baseball team manager (...) |
"Chemistry is a class you take in high school or college, where you figure out two plus two is 10, or something." - Dennis Rodman, NBA Basketball player, on Chicago Bull's team chemistry being overrated |
"We're just physically not physical enough." - Denny Crum, Louisville basketball coach (What?) |
"Can you get a ticket for running a stop sign that is not there?" - Driver school applicant |
"The world is more like it is now then it ever has before." - Dwight Eisenhower (Second stupidest president ever.) |
"I have opinions of my own --strong opinions-- but I don't always agree with them." - George Bush, former U.S. President (Like Father, Like Son.) |
"It is white." - George W. Bush, when asked what the White house was like by a student in East London (Yup) |
"If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight." - George Gobel |